How do I improve my Looks?

How do I make myself look more attractive?
How can I be a more attractive man?
How do I improve my appearance?
How do I become more attractive?

Yet more questions from the readers, they really are on fire!

If you are new to the blog, the good news is that here you will find a huge amount of actionable resources to help you improve your Looks and become a more attractive man. But before we get started, just a couple of questions for you.

Why do you want to improve your Looks?

Is it to be more successful in online dating?

The clear advantage of running this blog as a hobby, rather than as a commercial project aimed at making a buck, is that I can say things are they really are, without sugar-coating them, because I don’t need to tell the readers what they want to hear so that I can sell them some product afterwards.

And as such, I can clearly tell you that if you are planning on improving your Looks to be more successful in online dating, you will end up disappointed in the end, no matter how much hard work you put in. And I learnt this the hard way, see here for more details on my short-lived Tinder experience, and here for more details on women’s swiping habits. In my case it was easy to quickly write off Tinder as a complete waste of my time, because I’m good-looking and I get preferential treatment in real life, hence the discrepancy between real life vs. Tinder was literarily like night and day. Not many people have this unique insight though, and I think this is why a huge number of guys are still miserably trapped in online dating.

The very few guys for which online dating works based on Looks are mainly split into two very narrow niches: male-model-looking guys, who can upload the most normal photo of their face and get the job done, and guys having a sexy rugged edge to them. Then there are the fakes – guys on steroids, guys who rent boats and supercars to pretend they live a life of luxury, etc – but those scammers are beyond the point of this post.

All this to say – yes, work hard and improve your Looks, I’m a firm believer that everyone should make an effort to look as attractive as they can, because life is just better when you look good, and the world will literarily smile at you.

But then, after you have enhanced your Looks, use this new leverage of yours in the real world, where it can deliver some great results, contrary to the rigged and misandric false economy which online dating is.

All right, if you are still with me after all this talking, let’s get down to business now!

Here is the 11,000-word guide which I prepared with my knowledge on the matter:

Maximising your Looks

The above guide will give you a solid framework to work with, and a good number of actionable recommendations already. But that is only the initial part of the journey…

Within that post you will find the links to the follow-up posts written to bring some specific conversations one level deeper, and then in the Links section there are the free external resources which I personally used and which I recommend.

Guys, we are talking about a hell of a lot of work here, and that’s actually a good thing. A very good thing, to be precise.

If you think about it, some of the guys who accidentally bumped into this post quickly went back to Twitter after their 140-character attention span was used up. Then there are the guys who were looking for some shortcut to bang catwalk models by tomorrow, and those guys were surely put off by the dose of reality offered earlier on. Some other guys will actually open the above guide, only to realise that it’s a huge undertaking indeed, and they will call it a day by promising to themselves that, “I will get serious about it next week”. Etc. Only a very limited number of guys will take the task seriously, will put in the required amount of effort, and will get to benefit from the end result.

If I didn’t manage to discourage you just yet, and trust me I’m doing the best I can to get rid of shortcut hunters, delusional dreamers and similarly mediocre individuals, in that case let me share with you that fashion and grooming is where you will have the quickest and most effective boost to your Looks compared to the effort you put in.

Grooming is entirely discussed in the above guide, and fashion has three dedicated follow-up posts covering first Style, then Fit, and finally Fabrics if you really want to do things right.

To wrap up this introductory conversation, when people say that they want to improve their Looks, what they really mean is that they want to be more attractive, and Vibe is another thing which has a huge impact on your global attractiveness.

I wrote a separate post on building a dominant Vibe:

Constructing a dominant Vibe

I must confess that I somewhat underestimated myself the importance of projecting the right Vibe, meaning that I already knew it was important, but I couldn’t imagine it was that important. Until I started going around with my face fully covered during the pandemic, and looking a bit thinner than usual because of the physical inactivity caused by the lockdown, only to realise that I was still able to get some IOAs despite all those drawbacks. As such, this may be another interesting read for you:

The importance of walking the right way

If you get serious about improving your Fundamentals, initially you will feel just like the guy pictured in “phase 2” of the Improvement Journey. That vertical cliff is steep indeed, and it does another level of screening, since the not-so-determined guys will give up progressively along the way. Again, this is a good thing because not many guys will go all the way through, and consequently the very few guys which do will be able to better stick out of the crowd.

You can find the full list of all the relevant posts in the section index, and then there is also a descriptive index should you prefer that alternative format instead.

No matter which of the two above lists you prefer to go through, have a good read at the three posts in the “mindset” category, because there are some common mental pitfalls which you can already identify and pre-emptively dodge, in order to steer clear of the bitterness which is likely to pop up at different stages of your Improvement Journey.

Good luck!

The Essentials:
• Fundamentals